This past weekend I was hanging out in the city with a few of my friends. The city is the place to be on the weekends. You’ll find some of everything there — residents, tourists, freaks, geeks, foreigners, dudes, chicks, dudes dressed as chicks, chicks dressed as dudes, and the homeless. While we were hanging out in the city, my friends and I were approached by homeless people multiple times.
Having spent four years of my life bombarded by panhandlers in Chicago, saying no is practically second nature to me now. Seeing the same people on the El asking for money every weekend made me grow rather cynical. There was one incident in particular where one of the perpetual panhandlers started saying his lines, and a lady started warning the other passengers not to give him money because he didn’t need it.
In other incidents, I’ve seen homeless people flat out refuse food from others just trying to help them out. Apparently, some of them are hungry for money, not food. Other times I’ve seen people give a homeless person some money, only for the homeless person to get mad when they can’t spare a little more. These experiences have left quite an impression on me, and that’s why I never give homeless people money.
I know it sounds selfish, and maybe it is. However, this study shows that I’d fit right in with the college students at UNC when it comes to giving handouts to the homeless. Here are the main reasons I never give homeless people money.
You don’t know what they are going to do with it. I really hate the feeling of not knowing if they spend the money on something useful. Of course, their signs always mention they need money for food, but we all know that it could just as easily go towards drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes. I’m not trying to stereotype all homeless people this way, but my biggest concern is that I have no idea which ones are being genuine and honest.
Sometimes they aren’t even thankful. As I mentioned before, some homeless people blatantly refuse food offerings because they’d prefer money. That’s like having a friend throw away a birthday cake you made for them because they prefer pie. It just doesn’t make sense to me. I’ve helped an old lady cross the street and held doors open for strangers, and these people have been more grateful than any homeless person I ever gave money to before I adopted my new policy.
There are better alternatives. In fact, maybe the reason some homeless people aren’t thrilled about money and food is because they’re really just looking for conversation, as this article suggests. As far as money is concerned, I prefer donating to organizations that help the homeless rather than giving money directly to the homeless, because I know that the money will be used appropriately.
With that being said, my friends see things differently. All of them ended up giving change to most of the homeless people we ran into this weekend. In fact, one of the homeless guys tried to make me feel guilty for being the only person in our group to not give him some money, and it made me wonder.
Do we give money to the homeless to help them out or do we do it to feel better about ourselves?
Most, if not all, of the people I’ve met who regularly give money to the homeless mention a common feeling — guilt. When you mention that the homeless person could spend the money on something bad, they usually say something like, “That’s not my responsibility anymore.” Basically, they’ve done their good deed, and the overwhelming feeling of guilt is gone.
Do you give money to the homeless? Is the act of giving a selfish act?
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I use to think the same way about not giving money to homeless people but my cousin ricky cahnged my mind because he said ” its the right thing to do beacuse at least i know i did my part by helping and how ever he spends it thats his problem I tried”. and thats right if you give it to them at least you did try if you dont want to give them money then dont
I don’t think that just giving money is “trying.” My husband and I for the most part do not give money. We will give sort of “care packages.” It contains some inexpensive items, usually at least one meal that is non-perishable, maybe a toothbrush and floss. extra bottle of water, and a shirt. (when a local thrift store has their $1 per bag sell we stock up) Of course we live in a place that everyone has a car so this may not be practical for true city dwellers. If it is an issue, maybe donate to a church or other program. A few pennies here and there may help your conscience, but an act of kindness can really make a difference.
The comments that I have read here just make me sick. I am on the absolute verge of becoming homeless and I am not a rodent. I have three beautiful, well-groomed, above average intelligence children. I am a daycare teacher, and in school to receive my undergraduate degree, then (was) planning on going towards my graduate in psychology. I am also a veteran, and because of a by-law that is never mentioned, I will not be getting my educational benefits this summer. Which leaves me with no way to pay my bills. at all. Sometimes everything just crumbles down around you at once and there is no way out of it because people with the same mentality that all of you have are the only ones around
Kimberly,
Life’s not fair and it has brought you where you are via your decisions and chance. Yes, it does not sound like a good place but with hard work and some help from family, friends and many of the organizations and government agencies that exist to help people like you you should be able to recover.
The amazing thing is all of the different types of homeless people. There are hobos that sleep in their cars, pickup-bed campers, and even tents at local campgrounds. They often have families, but they try to EARN a living by offering to clean windshields, trim tree limbs, trade scrap metal and so on. In a few cases these folks may ask for handouts if they’re in a bind, but they often have too much pride. There are even some cases of people working full or part time jobs but technically homeless.
In a few cases they will be homeless for a short time and get back on their feet again and live successful lives, especially with help from family or community groups. But you have so many others that are homeless because they are mentally ill and can’t maintain healthy relationships with family, friends, coworkers and bosses. Yes, these folks will often spend your money on drugs or alcohol, but they have hit rock bottom with little hope left. They can’t set up bank accounts and save up handouts to pull themselves out of dispair. They can’t take the chance to let their day’s cash stay in their pocket overnight because the other street people will mug them. So if they have too much cash they will spend it quick on the best drugs or alcohol they can get.
They look like trash, smell like trash, dress like trash, have no references, no reliable transportation, no resume, often can’t comprehend an employment application, and in many cases aren’t physically fit for strenuous day labor. Thousands die on the street every year from treatable and curable diseases or freezing to death. The more time on the street the more deranged (and dangerous) they get, especially in areas without any public assistance.
Most major cities do have programs to help the chronically homeless, and just because these homeless people look healthy enough to work, they would not be if left alone on the streets. People complain about the government helping the homeless as if their tax dollars were personally being robbed from their pockets to provide a living to those too lazy to work, but originally this was not the case. Trust me, you don’t want to live in an area that lets their homeless go without any help at all. VERY dangerous places they are.
However, what you see more often these days are people who have learned to take advantage of people. People who scammed and stole from their friends, neighbors, and employers and have no one to help them now, except charity groups and government assistance. Once they find that they qualify they take full advantage of whatever they can get, pretend to seek honest work in order to rip off home owners with common repair scams, occasionally rob and steal, and aggresively seek handouts. You can usually tell the difference between a scam artist pan-handler and the true homeless. The truly homeless guy is passed out in an alley with no one helping him while the scam artist is the slightly better dressed, coherent speaker with a well played sob story – and often with a warm apartment to go home to after pretending to “live” on the street. It ticks me off when they don’t remember you and give you the same story a year later about just getting kicked out of their home by a crooked landlord.
So, yes, I do give to homeless even if I know they will spend it on drugs or alcohol. Most shelters only provide short term assistance and you might be surprised to learn that many of these programs require homeless people to wait on a list, and they often require the homeless to contribute some cash to the programs that are benefitting them. So, to a certain degree, they are almost expected or required to ask for handouts if they can’t figure out how to earn it.
Sure I could blame them for not working hard in school, not putting effort into their social skills or taking that first drink, but it’s too late for that now. The question is, do I want to be surrounded by destitute people with absolutely nothing to lose? People whose life can’t get any worse by killing me for the cash in my wallet? Or would I rather live in a society with a baseline below which on one can fall under? An expectation that no matter how bad it gets there will be at least one or two cold meals a day, a blanket, sometimes a bed, emergency medical treatment, maybe even programs that can help those lives which can still be salvaged.
I’m not saying that it’s the government’s responsibility, the church’s responsibility, or your responsibility. But I would prefer to live in an area where extreme poverty does not become a threat to those who are perceived to have more than enough, such as myself. I don’t feel that it’s a waste to give a dollar directly to a homeless man. But it won’t make a huge impact in his life or mine. I wouldn’t bother to give to any panhandler if the local support systems didn’t have cracks in them. I try to give excuses to the obvious scam artists, like “just spent it at the gas station”. I try to help when I can by volunteering and contributing to national and international missions work. And while religious based, the groups I support do not withhold aid from those of other faiths. Not only are they better off, but the working and successful people in their communities are better off too. History has shown that the “let them eat cake approach” is not healthy for the rich or the poor.
I never cared what will they do with that money and i never thought about if i was doing it to feel better or to help them out. I always saw it as something i should do and and many times i really felt sorry for them. What i cant stand is when i see someone is not thankful at all, like its our obligation to give them money.
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